Gratitude is an emotion expressing appreciation for what you have. The dictionary defines gratitude as the quality of being thankful, including a readiness to show appreciation for and to return kindness. Gratitude has long been an emotion associated with religious practice, and all of the world’s religions and faith traditions encourage gratitude as an essential element of moral practice.
Since antiquity, philosophers have studied, theorized, and recommended the virtue of gratitude. Gratitude has also been associated with spirituality. And, during the past decade, psychologists and others have begun studying gratitude. Those studies have demonstrated that grateful people are happier, less depressed, less stressed, and more satisfied with their lives and relationships.
So, if you want to experience more positive emotions, feel more deeply alive, sleep better, and even strengthen your immune system, be intentionally grateful for even the smallest things that you have. Neuroscientists have demonstrated that intentional gratitude rewires our brains in positive ways. Why do most of us have such a hard time being grateful?
Our human nature is not hardwired for gratitude. In my experience, it’s just the opposite. Our human nature is hardwired to complain. For every grateful and happy person we’re blessed to meet, we encounter five complainers and unhappy individuals.
I once worked for a CEO who prided himself with what he called finding the “hole” in the donut. His approach to life was to look for what was wrong rather than what was right in every situation. I noticed that he was an unhappy man! I also noticed that those who worked for him also became unhappy and complainers over time. Incidentally, he didn’t have any long-term staff members.
So, why is gratitude a key to living an ethically intelligent life? Being grateful requires humility and mindfulness. It requires us to respect insignificance. When we’re grateful for the small things in life, gratefulness opens our minds and spirit so that we can “see” the people in our lives the world considers insignificant. Gratitude helps us maintain an open and clear Worldview Window.
Gratitude is a learned behavior. Using whatever method works for you, I encourage you to intentionally express gratitude for something at least twice a day. I also suggest maintaining a log or journal. Record your gratefulness. Did I mention there are apps for this? Intentionality is important, but significance is not. You don’t have to wait for that “big” event to express gratitude. Being grateful that you have a car to drive or that you have clothes to wear is a sufficient beginning. Or, be grateful that you have a place to live. Or, next time the elevator is out of order, be thankful that you can climb the stairs.
Cicero said, “Gratitude is not only the greatest of virtues, but the parent of all the others.” Here are a few special truths I’ve learned along the way.
- Until you’re grateful for what’s not enough, more than enough will never come.
- You will never get to where you want to go as long as you complain about where you are.
- Walk in humility.
- No one likes complainers.
- One of the few things we can control in life is our attitude.
- Attitude is a choice—choose gratitude.
Ethically intelligent people are humbly grateful, especially for knowing their purpose in life and pursuing it.
This post is adapted from my forthcoming book: Ethical Intelligence: The Foundation of Leadership. Available on Amazon in late October.
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